Goodbyes

There are many different types of Goodbyes.

There is the goodbye you say at the end of the day, when you know that you will see them again. The end of the day goodbye, the end of the work goodbye, the see you soon, see you tomorrow, see you soon kind of goodbye. The Au Revoir, the Auf Wiedersehn.

There is the goodbye that you don't say. Actions or words that dont say exactly say it but leave no doubt about it.

Then there is the goodbye that you make when you know that you will never see that person again. The final goodbye, whether said or not, when you know in your heart that you will not meet again. The hardest, and perhaps saddest that we make.

And occasionally, very occasionally, after making that goodbye, by some turn of fate or smile of God, you do meet again. It feels like a moment of Grace.

I left my job as a teacher in July, after 5 years. I said goodbyes to a lot of people, staff and students, that I knew I would never see again. A lot of close friends and pupils that during that time I had become very close too. It was a really emotional and difficult decision to execute - I had seen a lot of children become adults, learn about the world and take some big strides within it, and been a part of their journey. A lot of adults too, and probably most of all myself. Leaving it all behind was the right thing for me to do, but it was a very emotional experience saying goodbye, sad and joyful and painful and difficult and scary and many many more things.

And then, a month ago, I got a phone call early one morning. My replacement had suddenly been taken very ill, the school were in a really difficult position, had I booked my flights, could I possibly come in and cover. With hardly any hesitation, I agreed. I was still awaiting some documentation and my flights had not been booked.

So I found myself back at my school and amongst adults and children I honestly thought I would not see again. It is difficult to describe how joyful it was too see everyone again, and almost as surprising how joyful people were to see me. The hugs and the high fives went on for a couple of weeks before people got used to me being round.

I left again yesterday. I slipped out at the end of the day. This time without saying goodbye.